Wow, Fantastic Comments! Not So Fantastic Headless Bird.

I really was blown away by the comments you were kind (and open) enough to leave yesterday. I hadn't expected that kind of sharing when I posted, was just "talking" about something that I've been struggling with, particularly since Annie's death (15 weeks today).

I have the two blogs for this very reason: There are many things that I won't write about on the cats' blog, that's not what it's for. But my own...Well, here I have the freedom to post the absurd or ugly or joy-full or tragic. Life is messy and it certainly doesn't get "tidier" as we get older.

I want you all to know how deeply I appreciate your honesty and openness and sharing. It really does help that others understand how I feel (in this case me, but could be anyone) regarding Annie's treatments, pulling in to oneself for self-protection (or distracting oneself from grief), the fears of impending loss. I think the sharing has immense value, because you never know what impact someone's words will have. Even my dad had words of wisdom for me, via email.

What I didn't appreciate today was coming home from work early (one of those ice-pik-in-the-brain headaches that still lingers) and finding a headless bird on the ground by my shrub, adjacent to the front step.

Look away now if you'd rather not see the graphic image. There's no blood to worry about, though.

Last summer there were four house sparrows there, once. I assumed Niko, the neighbour's declawed cat, managed to catch them, since he hangs around under the shrub and on my doorstep. But now I wonder if it wasn't Toby, the stray/abandoned cat who comes every morning for breakfast. It's too dark at 4AM to see under the shrub, so the hapless bird might have been there this morning. But technically this space is Niko's territory, and I wouldn't have thought that Toby would leave his kill there.

Whoever the mighty hunter was and is, the question uppermost in my mind is whether I'm going to be picking up dead birds all summer. Because...eeeewwwwwwww. Gross, gross, gross. LOL.

And last summer I put the dead birds in the garage, all wrapped up in plastic...then promptly forgot about them come garbage pick-up day. It wasn't until a day or two later that I opened the garage door and saw the bag. I had to write myself a note ("Dead birds in garage") and tape the note to my kettle, to remember to dispose of them. This time I'll write the note right away, so I don't forget.  :-P

So that's all from me today. Since I'm marking the 15th week of Annie's passing, I'll end with one of her photos today.

I miss her so much.

 

Universal Blessings and Light to All Beings.