We're done here

Some of you might remember that I've mentioned (a time or ten) the Olav pine buffet I bought at Jysk 14 months ago, when Dad was last here.

It took six months before I bothered to prime it (after thinking staining would be a good idea and quickly finding out that wasn't the case). And another six months before I painted it.

Well, I thought I'd assemble it today, at long last.

In my heart, I think I knew where this would end up after the crappy paint job I did (didn't like the quality of furniture paint, wasn't happy with the colour, and had a few glommy blotches of dried paint on a couple of pieces).

But the clincher was realizing, as I was getting started, that the supposed pre-drilled holes on four pieces, for the door hinges, were non-existent.

Oh, I took my time, made sure I knew what pieces were the end ones, looked and looked and looked again, but nope, no hinge holes.

Okay, plan B. That was to assemble it without doors and have an open storage unit.

Well, this is the result:

A broken shelf, a crappy paint job made crappier from all the scratches, trying to get the shelves in and to stay in, which they weren't inclined to do, and a couple of broken short dowel-thingies.

Now, two or three summers ago I tried to make over three pieces in my house, a table, a lovely huge mirror, and my little kitchen countertop. I failed miserably at all three projects and swore then, never again.

Apparently my "never again" needed some reinforcement.

I can put together an Ikea dresser by myself. I can put together a Sauder entertainment stand by myself. I can put together various brands of pre-made low-end furniture by myself.

But I cannot put together an Olva pine buffet. And I'm pretty sure that even if I hadn't bothered to paint it, I still wouldn't have gotten it together without ruining it.

I'd suggest that no one ever buy this product, but I'm sure many have and have successfully assembled it. Hurrah for them.

This is a big, fat "F" all round.

And you can use your imagination as to what "f" words fit the bill.