Sometimes things resonate

I usually check TinyBuddha.com (and SimpleReminders.com) daily, and today found this:

http://tinybuddha.com/blog/releasing-expectations-okay-be-where-you-are/

It really resonated with me, so I thought I'd post the link, in case it resonates with anyone else.

The author hooked me with this:
"Now that I’m in my forties, I have experienced disappointment, failure, and confusion. Many times I have lost the path and sometimes it’s felt like there never was a path."
And this:
"It’s not like I had it easy in my early life, but by my twenties I’m sure I thought it would all go to plan. It never went to plan. I’m not sure there ever was a plan."
It's hard to release expectations of what our lives "should" look like. At 50, I feel like I "should" be financially secure, able to pay my bills and deal with emergencies, save enough for retirement, and to maintain (and improve) the house. I feel like I "should" be able to cope better with the stressors and lows in my life. I feel like I "should" be motivated to get myself "unstuck" and change so many things in my life (diet, exercise, work, etc.). I feel like I "should" have my shit together more than I do.

But none of those "shoulds" is my reality...and that, apparently, is Okay.

Toward the end of the article, she writes:
"We are often much harder on ourselves than anyone else would ever be. The rest of the world doesn’t center around us. You may think you’ve achieved nothing while, to the next person, you have everything. It’s all relative and it’s all perspective. None of us have an unbiased lens.

"There is no point wishing you were more than you are. It may all be happening this way for a reason. Even if there is no reason, the meaning you choose will make the difference."
It gives me food for thought, especially that last paragraph, because without a belief in a personal deity, I've struggled for years with the concept of a higher "plan" and to find any meaning to life--to my life. (As I've already blogged about too many times over the past handful of years!)

It's also a good reminder to be aware that I have everything I need in this moment, and that no matter how I feel about my life on any given day, I'm blessed in so many ways.

Peace.

Comments

Saku said…
I so agree with this writer, especially when she says "we are often much harder on ourselves than anyone else". I try very hard not to compare myself t anyone else because I had different opportunities and made my own choices and those two factors brought to where I am today.

If you are looking for meaning in your life, I'd consider the love and care you've given Annie, Chumley, Nicki and Derry to be one reason. There is also the encouragement you provide to those of us in the blogging world. And that's just from an outsider looking in.

You make the world a better place, and I for one, am grateful I came across your little corner of the web!
ANGEL ABBYGRACE said…
I often use the thought of the story of the person complaint about their feet hurting until you see someone with no legs. It's perspective. We all stress it must be wired into our DNA. but this was truly a lovely perspective.

PS
I do think it's easier to write an article than it sometimes is to live through stressful situations
The Cat Guy said…
I like that last bit about choice. We may not control the plan or the path but we can choose our internal response to the shit that comes our way. It's not easy however, but choosing kindness for oneself is usually the best choice.

Thanks for the kind comments on my recent post, your words were really meaningful to me.
John Bellen said…
I believe in God and that he has a plan for everyone; it may be that everyone's plan isn't a happy one. Further, however, I believe that His plan is so vast that there is no use trying to find one's place in it. That is why I think our paths are already decided, yet that decision is on such a great scale that what we do in life appears to influence it: all we can see is the small part of the plan that includes us.

I think the toughest part of life is the fact that so few of us can control even that part which it seems we should be able to. Those richer and more powerful than we, such as politicians and our employers, control our lives. This would be fine if they cared about those under their control.