Wow! What an "aha" moment!
I just read this article on TinyBuddha.com:
http://tinybuddha.com/blog/how-taking-no-action-can-help-you-change-your-life/
I can relate to everything the author wrote, both in my past (thinking unhappy relationship with my ex) and in my current life (thinking home situation and work too).
What hit me like a ton of bricks was this:
Because here I am, unhappy in my work and desperately unhappy with my living arrangements. Miserable and frustrated and so angry about being "stuck" in that stupid townhouse that needs so much cosmetic work, living on top of people, with all the noise and disturbance, unable to see better options given my circumstances. So miserable that most of the time I feel like I'm going to snap and start screaming...and scream and scream and scream until I'm dead.
And my reactions fall into two categories around both home and work:
One: Either I tell myself I'm so lucky and blessed to have what I do (and I truly AM), and if only I keep telling myself that enough times I'll magically transform my feelings into delight for my current life.
Two: I castigate myself for not having the strength of will, the finances, motivation, intelligence etc. [fill in the blank] to change my life NOW.
Never has it occurred to me to admit how unhappy I am, yet do nothing.
It's not part of our culture--if we can't change things, we're weak or incompetent or both.
I'm having a real "aha" moment over this. In fact, the thought that I can admit how I really feel, yet do nothing (because truthfully I'm not ready to make any changes), somehow is very freeing. I feel almost giddy in this moment. :-)
Peace.
http://tinybuddha.com/blog/how-taking-no-action-can-help-you-change-your-life/
I can relate to everything the author wrote, both in my past (thinking unhappy relationship with my ex) and in my current life (thinking home situation and work too).
What hit me like a ton of bricks was this:
"First, we must give ourselves permission to do absolutely nothing at all.Ton. Of. Bricks.
"The truth is, we can’t change what we don’t acknowledge. And we won’t acknowledge the problem if we think it means we have to take any kind of action before we feel ready to."
Because here I am, unhappy in my work and desperately unhappy with my living arrangements. Miserable and frustrated and so angry about being "stuck" in that stupid townhouse that needs so much cosmetic work, living on top of people, with all the noise and disturbance, unable to see better options given my circumstances. So miserable that most of the time I feel like I'm going to snap and start screaming...and scream and scream and scream until I'm dead.
And my reactions fall into two categories around both home and work:
One: Either I tell myself I'm so lucky and blessed to have what I do (and I truly AM), and if only I keep telling myself that enough times I'll magically transform my feelings into delight for my current life.
Two: I castigate myself for not having the strength of will, the finances, motivation, intelligence etc. [fill in the blank] to change my life NOW.
Never has it occurred to me to admit how unhappy I am, yet do nothing.
It's not part of our culture--if we can't change things, we're weak or incompetent or both.
I'm having a real "aha" moment over this. In fact, the thought that I can admit how I really feel, yet do nothing (because truthfully I'm not ready to make any changes), somehow is very freeing. I feel almost giddy in this moment. :-)
Peace.