Musings on a Small Life

So the man with the kids who's been around isn't just a contractor or repairman, he is the father and owner of the unit next door. I met him and his wife a short time ago-- finally they're moving in. I believe her name is Anne, they're from Markham (ON). Two kids, a boy and girl, one is six and the other is seven. Just the age range I thought. The parents look like they're in their very early 30s, though could be late 20s too, at least her. I told her that since I don't have a car and seldom need the driveway, to just ask me if they need an extra spot to park for a few hours, when they have company visiting. (We have a no-parking-on-the-street bylaw.) She was worried her new neighbour was anti-social (my word, haha) because of the addition to my fence. I explained it was to let my two cats out but keep them safe--she seemed quite relieved to hear that. And dismayed to hear that there are coyotes across the (major) street, in the extensive green space (I heard a ...

Yesterday, on the way home, I saw crocuses peeking up through the ground and snowdrops in bloom. Have never seen them so early in my entire life. Last year's snowdrops in March 2011 Today we're having a rare winter event, a bona fide snowstorm. I think we've had one storm per month all winter, either freezing rain or a few centimeters of snow that has melted rapidly. Maybe "Old Man Winter" has been saving up all his snow for this latter part of February and for March. No matter, Spring will be here soon. A very happy thought! Another happy thought: It's Friday. LOL. It's been a crazy busy week, but that's been good. Better for my mental health, to be fully occupied and not have time for dark thoughts to overwhelm me. And hey, the cat show is this weekend! I'm going tomorrow, regardless of weather. I have my admission coupon, have a bit of money put aside for a few little toys for the boys. Want another Laurel Burch bag, if the same seller is th...

It's a gorgeous sunny day, we have no snow till our forecast storm tonight and tomorrow, yet I still am craving green. That glorious, fresh green of Spring, new-shoot green, leaf-bud green. There's no green quite like it. To compensate (okay, that's a stretch), I'm eating orange, i.e. carrot cake. Much more appealing than my salad for lunch. My co-worker came to work yesterday and we had a good cry, holding onto each other, sobbing our hearts out. She's in today too, slept better last night, utterly emotionally exhausted. She'll be "okay," as we all are "okay" with such losses. Meaning we just carry on, fall apart when we have to, then pick ourselves up and keep going. It can really suck to be a human being sometimes. But sometimes, when you have a good cup of tea (I'll take my Lady Grey, thanks) and a piece of carrot cake, life is good in spite of its sorrows. Wishing my silk flowers were real.... Universal Blessings, Light and Me...

My co-worker, S., the one who was with me (and Annie) that last day, the one who has carried me through so much over the past eleven years, lost her heart dog, Neeka, yesterday. I don't know all the details, only that it was a tumour on her liver. As far as I know, Neeka had not been overtly sick, so I don't know what transpired over the weekend. But S., as you can understand, is devastated and is not at work today. Neeka was about ten years old, give or take, and was with S. through the upheaval in her life; she was to S. what Annie and Chum were to me. So my heart just aches for my co-worker, because I know exactly what she's going through. Such fragile Beings we are. And so short is our time with our beloved furry soul mates. Godspeed, Neeka.   Image done by Ann at Zoolatry Universal Blessings, Light and Mercy to All Beings.

...I actually found three that fit and that don't require hemming. Four pairs on Friday at Wal-Mart, eight pairs at Sears on Saturday and sixteen, yes, sixteen, pairs at Value Village today. Three at Value Village were great. Actually, one pair of jeans at Sears were perfect, great fit and the right length, but too pricey at $40. I don't buy anything that's not a good deal. There were two other pairs at Sears that fit nicely but were a bit too long and I don't like to hem. Besides, they were even more expensive than the jeans. (I tried them on only because the very nice, helpful sales clerk gave them to me.) However, I'm happy with today's slacks: two pairs of black (one denim, one light weight fabric for work) and one pair of navy striped cotton slacks. $5.99, $5.99 and $7.99, which beats one pair for $40 all to heck. Oh, I do love bargain shopping! BTW, the navy striped slacks must have had a very interesting scent accompanying them, as they prompted a bunn...

I saw this little angel figurine over the Christmas holidays, at our Hallmark store, but didn't want to pay the $20 for it, partly because of the cost and partly because I'm really not into the Christian representation of "angels." But she's stayed in my mind for almost two full months, so today I stopped in to the store and bought her. Eventually, when I have my memorial for Annie and Chumley set up to my satisfaction, she will go there. That was my only "me" purchase today. I did find a few more things for my shelter donation project, and some soft, chunky wool on sale for more kitty blankets, as well as cat food on sale. (I've got pics to post on one or both of the cat blogs when I do another update.) No slacks--arggh, let's not even go there. Maybe I'll venture to Value Village tomorrow, if I'm in the mood. It's been a lovely day off, though. I'm glad I took the vacation day. I hope everyone's enjoying their Friday! ...

Good thing I just found my coupon for $1 off the admission--the cat show is next weekend, not this weekend, as I had in mind. I'd have gone too, not even realizing I had the wrong week. DUH. That's a middle-aged moment. Well, Monday's a holiday and I'm taking tomorrow off anyway, will do some errands, putter around. Maybe I'll even venture out to Value Village on Saturday instead. Everyone knows today is Annie's "Bridge" day, so no need for me to really dwell on it. I've not fallen apart. I've gotten teary-eyed a few times, but each time it happens I stop myself, take a few deep breaths and focus on the present moment. The hardest part is reading everyone's kind and loving comments on the boys' blog . I'm practicing "Be kind to Kim" day. That's hard to do, to be kind and forgiving toward my Self. Practicing retail therapy is easier. Well, I do need new jeans, and new black and navy slacks. Quite badly, actually. Ha...

This is the week I've been dreading for quite some time, the anniversary of Annie's death being tomorrow, the 16th. Today, though, is actually 52 weeks and at this moment, on that Wednesday, I was at the clinic, courtesy of my co-worker, who stayed with me/us the entire time. I really don't want to go back in memory to that day, however. I'll make myself sick with grief if I do. Fortunately, I'm occupied with several work projects, and hope I also will be sufficiently busy tomorrow too. But oh yes, my heart is heavy. I did several collages of older pics of Annie, wasn't sure if I'd post them on either or both of the Fuzzy Tales blogs, but decided not to. So I'll post them here today. Tomorrow I will have a post on the cats' blogs (same one on both). And then...Well, then I don't know. A conscious effort to let the pain go and be at peace, I hope. I miss you, Annie. Universal Blessings, Light and Mercy to All Beings.

As some of you might remember, my stylist has been off work with her first baby since December 18th. (He was born by C-section on December 19th.) I had my last cut on Saturday the 17th, but haven't had hi-lites since October. Acck. For someone who goes a maximum of 6 weeks (preferably 5) in-between cuts, these two months have been long, hair-wise. No pun intended. And no, I haven't wanted to risk having someone else touch my hair. With or without good reason, it's my only vanity. Anyway, yesterday afternoon my stylist sent out a message to all her clients indicating she'd be starting back on Saturday March 3rd, listing her hours and prices. I replied right away that I'd be calling her ASAP this morning to book for a cut and colour, and absolutely would take a day off work in March if necessary. This morning, just before 9AM, I logged back in to my personal email to get her phone number, and she had replied, telling me she already had me booked for Saturday March 3...

We have winter again (crazy concept for February in Ontario). A few centimeters of snow; that's nothing. It's the freakin' minus 25 Celcius windchill we had today and will have tomorrow. I refused to venture out at all today--almost unheard of for me, for a Saturday--except for quickly clearing the driveway. Coffee with a friend tomorrow morning, but at least he'll pick me up, no waiting at a bus stop or trundling off on foot. Snapped around 5PM this afternoon. Even Nicki's not impressed with the temps or snow. Our City's greenhouse is open Sunday afternoons now, starting tomorrow. I won't be going right away. Maybe next weekend or the weekend after. Next weekend's the cat show, though. One of last year's greenhouse snapshots. I finished kitty blanket #11, which really is #10, this morning. The one I had on the go last weekend still is on the go. I put it aside to see how the remnant "unknown fibre" wool from Wal-Mart would knit up. Quick...

Did I need the grocery store check-out woman to peruse the label on the back of my low-sodium Kettle brand chips and gasp, then comment that a serving is 20% of one's daily fat intake? No. Did I feel the need to laugh and tell her that I very rarely buy chips because I much prefer sweets? Yes. Did I feel the need to come home and eat half the bag? Unfortunately, yes. Do I feel the need to balance that out with a small salad for supper? Yes. Should I add, to justify my chip intake, that we took our new staff member out to the Grad Club for lunch and I had a yummy spinach and feta quiche with tossed salad? That I didn't have a single French fry from the large basket one of my co-worker's got? Yes. Hmm, perhaps I ought to explore why I feel the need to make any excuses and justifications at all. Perhaps I'll do just that...after my salad. Universal Blessings, Light and Mercy to All Beings.

My "creativity," such as it is, appears to be on hiatus. Perhaps extended hiatus. Except for a recent spurt of collage-header-making via Picnik and Picasa. Picnik , as those of you who use it already know, is closing April 19th. In the meantime, everything is free, including their "fancy collages." I suggest you grab everything you can, while you can. I'm still waffling on what to do with the boys' blog. I've got a few new posts up on the other Fuzzy Tales blog, the one at http://fuzzy-tales.blogspot.com , and one scheduled for tomorrow on the "old" cat blog. Maybe I'll keep that one...maybe I won't. I'm not going to "fuss" about it right now, just take each day as it comes. It's only blogging, not important in the grand universal sense. Meanwhile, "real" life plods along. We had a new staff member start yesterday, hope she'll fit in and feel comfortable with us all. Still no new neighbours; the we...

I had the annual furnace cleaning/inspecting this afternoon, for the maintenance plan I buy. (Which actually has been very handy in the past, several times.) All's fine, igniter replaced (gas furnace). But for the first time, I had the option of signing up for equal monthly billing over the year. Apparently they've always had this option, but no one ever suggested it to me before. I'm glad this guy did, it's much easier to budget $25 per month than to shell out $300 at once--at least for me. So another one of those little boring life details has worked out just fine, at least for the moment. Nicki was very well behaved, by the way. Usually he makes a pest of himself, but he mostly stayed upstairs with me while the guy was here, only going down a few times to check things out. I was impressed. Derry hid under the guest futon, of course. Oh, I've seen the now-moved-out neighbour back a few times, including this afternoon. So the new owners don't have the keys y...

Yesterday's "occupy" protest was a yawner, at least for us. There was a rally at our athletic and recreation centre, but nothing happening around our building. Somewhat disappointing. I felt really sorry for the poor security guy who spend the entire day in the building's vestibule. Seriously. They didn't even rotate personnel for this. I don't even know if he got lunch--he had told me at one point, when I asked, that someone was supposed to give him a break at 1PM. Wouldn't surprise me if no one had, though. So much for our "excitement!" The cats aren't finding much excitement in the back space right now, either. Snapped yesterday through my window. I hope one of you is having some excitement--the positive kind, that is.  :-) Universal Blessings, Light and Mercy to All Beings.

We're waiting to see what happens with the Occupy (our university) protest that is taking place today. Apparently at least one of the local radio stations was indicating a start time of 10:30AM. Because it's not like students would crawl out of bed at 6AM to start something, right? Except during Frosh Week. I remember some years back, two or three Principals ago, that students occupied his office for two weeks. Peacefully, no big deal. I do recall they had to lower their chamber pot out the window, down three stories. Ha. Now, I do work in the main administrative building on campus, so am expecting some "excitement." We've all been brought up-to-date on security measures and on what to do in the slim chance we have to evacuate. And of course we're in lock down. Fun, fun, fun! Oh, I have my little pocket camera with me too, of course. You never know, I might be able to make use of it. :-P I hope everyone has an interesting day too! Any Febr...

So said a woman who passed me by yesterday, walking in the other direction. I have no idea if she was talking on a cell phone (didn't notice one in her hand, but she could have been hands-free), if she was talking to one of the voices in her head, talking to me, or if it was a comment on the paramedic SUV and ambulance that were trying to find the right driveway to turn in. But I wondered how many of us echo that sentiment. "Toes are the worst" is another quote, overheard on the last bus last Friday afternoon, spoken by a young girl/woman who could have been anywhere from mid-teens to late 20s. She was in the seat ahead of me, talking about mangled toe nails growing back in. Eeewwww. Some things just should not be discussed in public, IMO, whether that be via cell phone or face-to-face. I really do my best to ignore most things being spoken around me, but sometimes you just can't tune them out. Toby came for supper last night, surprisingly. He normally doesn't. ...

Yes, the neighbour with the scary dogs is in the process of moving out today. I was 98% sure she had sold the unit, as I hadn't seen it advertised when I looked the other week. I'm hoping for a few days' grace before the new owners move in. And I'm hoping--but not at all expecting--that they'll be good neighbours.  Other than that tidbit, all is quiet, figuratively and literally. The boys currently are sleeping, the snow has started (again), and it's a typical grey, January day. In our green space yesterday afternoon...complete with frozen lump from the plow. LOL. I was bitten by the cleaning and tidying bug this morning, so spent several hours clearing out stuff, reorganizing things, and doing the normal weekly house work. I need several boxes to pack up the remaining items for donation--I've used my spare boxes already. Maybe this is a harbinger of an early Spring this year, this "premature" urge to de-clutter. It certainly feels good! And may...

Maybe I ought to adopt this Thursday theme on my own blog, particularly since I'm not in the mood to blog much on the Fuzzy Tales site. Just my usual winter "blahs," coupled with the anniversary of Chum's death, and of course the first anniversary of Annie's passing looming on February 16th. So, for today, here's what I'm thankful for, in no particular order: A decent full-time job with a great boss An excess of food A home of my own Reasonably good health, I think. Hope. LOL. The boys, who by times drive me nuts, but always give me a focus beyond my petty self. Annie and Chum--they blessed me with their presence, even though I still keenly feel their loss. Dark chocolate with caramel chunks. Parents who still are alive and who love me. That we have "only" 54 days till the Spring equinox on March 20th. God's teeth, I can't wait for GREEN again! A coupon for a very small amount off the admission fee to the Canadian Cat Assoc...

January 24th five years ago was a freezing Wednesday. I went down to the Lake on my lunch hour and snapped a few ice pics, some of which follow. I went home after work and did my usual routine. I distinctly remember Chumley, who was a string guy, watch with great interest as I flossed my teeth that evening. Not long after I had gone to bed, the blood clot in his heart let go and cut off the circulation to his lower body. I will not go back in my memory, more than I already have, because that truly was a terrible, terrible night. But it is a good reminder that life can turn in a split second, a reminder to us all not to take anything for granted, especially the lives of our loved ones or even our own lives. Because in an instant it all can be taken from us, leaving us bereft of a true gift. My memories of Chumley are dim now, partly from the passing of the years and partly because I choose not to recall them vividly, especially those of that last night. But the lesson remains. ...

Getting close to Friday, yay! Still freezing weather, boo! So I guess I'll play catch-up on the "boring business of life." My bank currently is offering a mortgage rate of 2.99%, fixed for five years. I emailed my mortgage advisor to ask if it was worth breaking my existing mortgage, but she said no, as the penalty would be $4400. Yikes. However, she can do a blended rate, extend the term back out to five years (I have three years left on it), and shave 0.55% from my existing rate, thus cutting my amortization period by 9 months. Not a huge savings, but it's a win-win as far as I'm concerned, and it is my money after all. Anything I can save is great. As it is, I'll be in my early 60s before it's paid off. I thought about remortgaging to clear my ever-present credit card debt, but decided it's not worth it. Every time I clear my debt I run it up again within months. So I'll keep what I owe and pick away at it. It's my fault anyway. I had ho...